Hazrat Bibi Khadijah a.s Married with Prophet Hazrat Muhammad s.a.w

- THE FIRST LADY OF ISLAM

By: Abbas Shahid Baqir

Till that time the financial and economic conditions of the Prophet had not improved and he still needed financial help from his uncle Abu Talib. His business matters were apparently not so firm as yet that he should choose a wife and set up a family.

His last journey to Syria and that too in the capacity of the agent and representative of a wealthy and well-known lady of Quraysh (Khadijah) stabilised his financial and economic condition to some extent. His courage and skill attracted the admiration of Khadijah and she expressed her willingness to pay him as a prize something over and above the settled amount. However the Prophet accepted only that remuneration which had been agreed upon originally. He then proceeded to the house of Abu Talib and handed over to him all that he had earned so as to ensure some relief for his uncle.

Abu Taiib had been waiting impatiently for his nephew who was the souvenir of his father (Abdul Muttalib) and his brother Abdullah. Tears trickled down his eyes as soon as he saw him. He was nevertheless very much pleased to learn about his business activities arid the profit that he had made and expressed his willingness to

place two horses and two camels at his disposal so that he

could continue his business. As regards the money

which he had earned during the said journey and had

[1] Tabaqat-i Kubra page 140

[2] Biharul Anwar vol. XV page 18.

( 152 )

handed over to his uncle he (Abu Talib) decided to utilize it for choosing a wife for his nephew.

In these conditions the Holy Prophet decided to choose a spouse for himself. The question however is as to how the lot fell upon Khadijah who had previously rejected the proposals of the most wealthy and influential men of Quraysh like Uqbah bin Abi Mu'it Abu Jahl and Abu Sufyan. What were the causes which brought together these two persons who were absolutely different from each other from the point of view of their respective lives and which created such cordial relations love and spiritual cohesion between them that Khadijah put her entire wealth at the disposal of Muhammad and spent her wealth which she gained from her business which extended upto Egypt and Ethiopia in the path of monotheism and for the exaltation of truth? And how was it that the house which was full of chairs studded with ivory and pearls and decorated with Indian silks and Iranian brocade curtains eventually became an asylum for the Muslims?

The causes of these events should be ascertained from the life history of Khadijah. However the thing which is indisputable is that services indulgence and self-sacrifice of this kind cannot certainly become permanent unless they have a firm pure and spiritual origin.

Pages of history testify that this marriage was the outcome of the faith of Khadijah in the piety chastity virtue and honesty of the Holy Prophet the dear one of Quraysh and the life history of Khadijah and narrations about her attainments make this fact abundantly clear.

As she was a chaste and virtuous woman she wished to marry a pious and virtuous husband and it was for this reason that the Holy Prophet said about her "Khadijah is one of the honourable ladies of Paradise". And the first woman who expressed faith in Muhammad was Khadijah. Imam Ali the Commander of the Faithful while describing in one of his sermons the pitiful condition of Islam in the early days of the prophetic mission of the Holy Prophet says "There was then no Muslim family except the family consisting of Muhammad and his wife Khadijah. and I was its third member".

Ibne Athir says that a merchant named Afif came in

( 153 )

Masjidul Harem and was very much surprised to observe the gathering there and worship by a group consisting of three persons. He saw that the Holy Prophet was offering prayers along with Khadijah and Ali. On his return from the Masjid he met Abbas the uncle of the Prophet. He told him what he had seen and inquired about the factual position. Abbas said to him The leader amongst those three persons is claimant of Prophethood and the woman is his wife Khadijah and the third person is my nephew Ali . Then he added I am not aware of any person on the face of the earth who should be a follower of this religion except these three .

It is beyond the scope of this book to explain and quote the narratives which have come down about the excellence of Khadijah. It would therefore be better that we should explain the causes which occasioned this historical event (i.e. marriage of Muhammad and Khadija).

THE PATENT AND LATENT CAUSES OF THE MARRIAGE

Materialists who study everything from the materialistic point of view imagine that as Khadijah was rich and a trades-woman she was very much in need of an honest person in connection with her commercial affairs and she therefore married Muhammad; and as Muhammad was also aware of her respectable position he consented to her request although there was disparity in their ages. However history tells us that Khadijah was prompted to marry Muhammad the 'honest man' of Quraysh owing to a series of spiritual causes and this union had no material aspect. Evidence in support of our claim is as follows:

1. When Khadijah enquired from Maysarah about the incidents related to the journey of the Prophet he narrated to her the miracles which he had seen from him and also what he had heard from the monk of Syria. Khadijah felt excessive emotion within herself which had its origin in her interest in the spirituality of Muhammad and she said to Maysarah involuntarily "Maysarah! That will do. You have doubled my interest in Muhammad. I hereby set you and your wife free and also place at your disposal two hundred dirhams. two horses and a costly dress ".

( 154 )

Thereafter she narrated what she had heard from Maysarah to Waraqah bin Nawfal who was a sage of Arabia and he said: "One who possesses these attributes is the Arabian Prophet".[1]

2. One day Khadijah was seated in her house while her bonds-women and slaves encircled her. One of the Jewish scholars was also present. By chance the Prophet passed that way and the Jewish scholar saw him. He at once requested Khadijah to insist upon Muhammad that he should postpone his task and join that party for a few moments. The Prophet accepted the request of the Jewish sage which was based on observation of the signs of prophethood in his person. Khadijah then turned to the Jewish sage and said "When his uncles will become aware of your investigation and inquisitiveness they will display an adverse reaction because they are afraid of the Jews about their nephew". The Jewish sage then replied: "How can it be possible that anyone should harm Muhammad when the hand of destiny has reared him up for the last prophethood and for the guidance of the people?" Khadijah said: "On what authority do you say that he will come to hold this position?" He replied: "I have read the signs of the last Prophet in the Taurat. His signs include three things that is his parents will die his grandfather and uncle will support him and he will choose for his spouse a woman who will be the lady of Quraysh". Then he pointed to Khadijah and said: "Blessed is she who has the honour of being his life-mate".[2]

3. Waraqah uncle of Khadijah was one of the sages of Arabia. He had thorough knowledge of the Bible and used to say time and again: "A man will be raised by Allah from amongst Quraysh for the guidance of the people and he shall marry one of the richest ladies of Quraysh". And as Khadijah was the richest woman of Quraysh he occasionally said to her: "A day will come when you will marry the noblest man on earth!"

4. One night Khadijah dreamt that the sun revolved above Makkah and then descended slowly and landed in her house.

She related her dream to Waraqah bin Nawfal and he interpreted

it thus: "You will marry a great man and he will become

[1] Seerah-i ibn Hisham vol. I page 26.

[2] Biharul Anwar vol. XVI page 19.

( 155 )

renowned throughout the world".

These are the incidents which have been quoted by some historians and by late Allamah Majlisi[1] and have also been recorded in many history books. When all of them are taken into account they make crystal clear the reasons for the inclination of Khadijah towards the Prophet. This inclination was mostly due to her belief in the spirituality of the Prophet and the fact that the 'honest one' was more suitable for her business than others had no bearing on the consummation of this union.

CIRCUMSTANCES OF KHADIJAH'S SUIT

This much is admitted that the proposal originated from the side of Khadijah herself; so much so that Ibn Hisham quotes[2] that Khadijah expressed her inclination personally and said: "Cousin! On account of the relationship which exists between us and the greatness and respect which you enjoy amongst your people and the honesty good manners and truthfulness which you evidently possess I am earnestly inclined to marry you". The 'honest man' of Quraysh replied "I must inform my uncles about this and this task should be accomplished with their approval".

Most of the historians believe that Nafisah daughter of 'Alyah conveyed the proposal of Khadijah to the Prophet in the following manner:

She said O Muhammad! Why don't you illuminate the night-chamber of your life with the light of a spouse? Will you respond favourably if I invite you to beauty, wealth, gentleness and respect? The Prophet said "What do you mean?" She then mentioned Khadijah. The Prophet said Is Khadijah prepared for this, when there is a world of difference between the conditions of my life and of hers? Nafisah said I hold authority on her behalf and shall make her agree. You should fix a date for the purpose so that her agent ('Amr bin Asad) may sit along with you and your kinsfolk and the ceremonies of marriage and rejoicing may be accomplished.[3]

[1] Biharul Anwar vol. Vl page 124.

[2] Seerah-i Ibn Hisham vol. I page 204.

[3] It is well-known that Khuwaylid the father of Khadijah was killed in

( 156 )

The Holy Prophet talked about the matter with his honourable uncle (Abu Talib). A grand party consisting of distinguished persons amongst Quraysh was organized. In the first instance Abu Talib delivered a sermon commencing it with praise for Allah. As regards his nephew he introduced him thus "My nephew Muhammad bin Abdullah is superior to any man of the tribe of Quraysh with whom he may be compared. Although he lacks every sort of wealth yet wealth is a passing shadow and origin and lineage is something permanent.[1]

As Abu .Talib had made in his sermon a mention of Quraysh and the family of Hashim Waraqah uncle of Khadijah said in reply "None amongst Quraysh denies your excellence. We earnestly wish to hold the string of your nobility. The marriage ceremony was then performed and the dowry was fixed at four hundred dinars. Some say that the dowry was twenty camels.

Age of Khadijah: It is usually said that at the time of marriage with the Prophet Khadijah was forty years old and was born fifteen years before the 'Year of the Elephant'. However some writers have mentioned that her age at the time of marriage was lesser than this. Previously she had married twice. The names of her husbands were 'Ais bin Abid and Abu Halah and both of them had died.

a Fujjar Battle and for this reason her uncle authorized marriage on her behalf. Thus the view recorded by some historians that in the first instance Khuwaylid was not agreeable but later he agreed owing to the severe inclination of Khadijah is baseless.

[1] Manaqib vol. I page 30 and Biharul Anwar vol. XV page 6.

FROM MARRIAGE UP TO PROPHETHOOD

The most sensitive period of the life of a person begins when he (or she) comes of age. It is so because at this time the sexual instincts attain perfection the sensual self inspires passions in one's head every moment the storm of lust darkens the atmosphere of human intellect the foundation of the rule of material instincts becomes more firm and as a result of all this the lamp of wisdom becomes dim. During day and night and time and again a grand palace of desires assumes a concrete form before the eyes of the grown up person.

In case at such time someone also possesses wealth life for him becomes something very dangerous. When animal instincts and good health and material opportunities and enormous wealth of a man are united the result is that they make the program of his life full of lustful activities and he is saturated with concupiscible desires without any care for future.

This period is called the frontier of prosperity and adversity and one rarely succeeds in determining the other route for oneself and in selecting with the hope of acquiring good habits and pure mentality a path which may keep one safe from all dangers.

In such circumstances it is a very difficult task to take care of oneself and in case the person concerned has not been brought up and educated properly in family environments one should only wait for the collapse of the structure of life.

MANHOOD OF THE HOLY PROPHET

There is no doubt about the fact that the Prophet was

brave strong and healthy because he had been brought up

( 158 )

in taintless environments and all members of the family in which he was born possessed elements of heroism and bravery. The huge wealth of Khadijah was also at his disposal and all means of comfortable life were available to him. However it should be seen as to how he utilized these material resources. Did he choose a life of pleasure and did he resort to the satisfaction of his passions like other young men? Or that notwithstanding all these means and resources he selected another program which fully revealed the background of his sensitive life? History bears testimony to the fact that he led his life like wise and experienced men. He always avoided profligacy and recklessness and signs of prudence and reflection were ever apparent in his countenance. To remain away from the corruption of the society he spent a good deal of his time in caves situated at the feet of the mountains and studied the signs of Divine power and reflected upon the creation of the Universe.

SENTIMENTS OF HIS MANHOOD

An incident which took place in the bazaar of Makkah wounded the human sentiments of the Prophet. He saw a person gambling. Unfortunately the man lost his camel as well as his residential house in the game. And not only this but he also staked and lost ten years of his life. The Prophet was so much moved by this incident that he did not stay in Makkah that day. He therefore went away to the nearby hills and returned home after a part of the night had passed. He was moved to observe such sad spectacles and reflected on and wondered at the lack of wisdom and intelligence of those misguided people.

Before Khadijah married the Prophet Muhammad her house was the center of the hopes of the needy people. And even after her marriage with the Prophet she did not allow even the slightest change to take place in the condition of her house or in the munificence and generosity of her spouse.

During the periods of famine and drought the Prophet's foster-mother Halimah came at times to see her son. The Prophet then

used to spread his cloak under her feet recollected her kind

sentiments and the simple life which he had spent with her and

listened to what she said. At the time of her departure he

( 159 )

helped her with as much as he could afford.[1]

HIS CHILDREN FROM KHADIJAH

Birth of a child further cements the bond of matrimony and makes life bright and brilliant. The Prophet's wife bore him six children. Two of them were sons - the elder one being Qasim and the younger one Abdullah. They are also called Tayyib and Tahir. She also gave birth to four daughters. Ibne Hisham writes: 'Their eldest daughter was Ruqayyah and the other three were Zaynab Umme Kulsum and Fatimah'. The male children died before Muhammad was appointed to the prophetic mission but the daughters continued to live.'[2]

Self-control of the Holy Prophet in the face of calamitous happenings was proverbial. However at the time of the death of his children the sentiments of his heart sometimes appeared from his eyes in the shape of tears which trickled down to his cheeks and this matter became more evident at the time of the death or Ibrahim whose mother was Mariyah. At that time while his heart was grief-stricken the Prophet was busy praising Allah with his tongue. So much so that an Arab owing to his ignorance and lack of knowledge about the fundamentals of Islam objected to the weeping of the Prophet. The Prophet however said: "Weeping of this kind is a blessing". [3]

UNFOUNDED GUESS

Dr Haikal writes: "There is no denying the fact that at the time of the death of each of her children Khadijah approached the idols and asked as to why the gods were not pleased to bless her". [4]

[1] Seerah-i Halabi vol. I page 123.

[2] Manaqib Ibn Shehr Ashob vol. I page 140; Qurbul Asnad pp. 6 and 7; al-Khisa'il vol. II page 37; Biharul Anwar vol. XXII pp. 151 - 152. Some historians say that the Prophet's male children were more than two. (Tarikh-i Tabari vol. II page 35 and Biharul Anwar vol. XXII page 166).

[3] Amali Shaykh page 247.

[4] Hayat-i Muhammad page 186.

( 160 )

The above statement is not supported even by the most insignificant historical evidence and is nothing more than a mere guess. Its purpose is to give the impression that as during her time all were idolaters Khadijah too was certainly like them.

However Shi'ah belief is opposed to this statement and naturally the factual position too should be as believed by Shi'ah. The reason for this is that the Prophet undoubtedly hated worship from his very youth and the position became quite clear during his journey to Syria. For when he developed some differences with a merchant with regard to accounts and the opposite part swore by Lat and 'Uzza the Prophet said "These are the very things which are most despicable in my eyes!"

In the circumstances how can it be said that a woman like Khadijah whose regard and love for her husband was unquestionable should run to the idols (who were the most despicable things in the eyes of her husband) at the time of the death of her children. Moreover the cause of her inclination towards Muhammad and of her entering into matrimonial alliance with him was that she admired his habits and spirituality as she had heard that he was the last of the Prophets. In these conditions how can it be possible that she should go and complain to the idols in the matter?

We have already narrated for the readers some of her conversations with Waraqah bin Nawfal (the Arab fortune-teller) as well as with other scholarly persons of that time.

ADOPTED SON OF THE PROPHET OF ISLAM

The Prophet of Islam called Zayd bin Harith as his son by the side of the Black Stone. Zayd was the person whom the Arab bandits had captured from the frontiers of Syria and had sold him in the market-place of Makkah to Hakim a relative of Khadijah. It is not however clear as to how it so happened that later he was purchased by Khadijah.

The author of 'Hayat-i Muhammad' says "The Prophet had felt the death of his sons very much and in order to console himself had asked Khadijah to purchase Zayd. Later the Prophet freed him and adopted him as his own son".

Majority of the writers however say that at the time of

( 161 )

Khadijah's marriage with the Prophet Hakim bin Hizam presented him (Zayd) to his aunt (Khadijah). As he (Zayd) was a virtuous and intelligent young man in all respects the Prophet developed a liking for him and Khadijah too made a gift of him to the Prophet. At last however Zayd's father located his whereabouts after continuous inquiries. At that time the Prophet permitted Zayd to go away with his father. However in view of the love and kindness of the Prophet for him Zayd preferred to stay on with him. It was on this account that the Prophet freed him adopted him as his son; and married him to Zaynab daughter of Jahash. [1]

BEGINNING OF DIFFERENCES AMONG THE IDOLATERS

With the appointment of the Prophet to the prophetic mission deep differences appeared among the Quraysh though the foundation of these differences had been laid a long time ago and even before the appointment of the Prophet to prophethood a number of wise men had expressed their dislike and aversion for the religion of the Arabs. There was always a talk in every nook and cranny about the expected Arabian Prophet who was to revive the practice of worship of One Allah. The Jews used to say: "As the foundation of our religion as well as that of the Arabian Prophet is the same we shall follow him and with the help of his strength shall break the idols and destroy the edifice of idol-worship.

Ibne Hisham says in his Seerah[2] "The Jews used to threaten the idolatrous Arabs saying that the time of the appearance of the Arabian Prophet was approaching fast and he would destroy the edifice of idol-worship. These words presented before the eyes of the Arabs the scene of the overthrow of the era of idol-worship. So much so that on account of the previous preachings of the Jews some tribes responded to the call of the Holy Prophet and embraced Islam. However for reasons which will be explained later the Jews continued to persist in their infidelity. The following verse of the Holy Qur'an points to the same position:

[1] al-lsaba vol. I page 545; Usudul Ghabah vol. II page 224.

[2] Seerah-i Ibn Hisham vol. I page 231.

( 162 )

Now that a book (the Qur'an confirming their own Taurat) has come to them from Allah they deny it although they know it to be the truth and have long prayed for help against the believers (through the new religion and the new Book). May Allah's curse be upon the infidels!" (Surah aI-Baqarah verse 89).

__._,_.___

Reply to sender | Reply to group | Reply via web post | Start a New Topic

Messages in this topic (1)

Recent Activity: