A man dashes into the Pope's office, panting, gasping, and trying to speak all at once.
"What's the matter?" the Pope asks, offering the man a seat.
"Oh your Grace!" the man exclaims, flopping on the chair. "I have good news and I have bad news. Which would you like to ehar first?"
"Give me the good news," the Pope says.
"Oh your Grace! JESUS is on the phone and he wants to speak to you!" the panting man exclaims.
"Praise the Lord!" the jublilant Pope replies, "What could the bad news possibly be?"
"Your Grace, he's calling form Makkah!"
"What's the matter?" the Pope asks, offering the man a seat.
"Oh your Grace!" the man exclaims, flopping on the chair. "I have good news and I have bad news. Which would you like to ehar first?"
"Give me the good news," the Pope says.
"Oh your Grace! JESUS is on the phone and he wants to speak to you!" the panting man exclaims.
"Praise the Lord!" the jublilant Pope replies, "What could the bad news possibly be?"
"Your Grace, he's calling form Makkah!"
A Salafi (but it was originally a jewish joke) is in a parking-lot he is looking for a parking space for quite sometime...
he finally starts making dua...
he says: "O' Allah if you please show me a parking spot or some space, I promise to love your Rasul
and the AhlulBayt 
"
Right then, the car right in-front of him pulls out of a parking-bay, leaving an empty space...
He says: "Nevermind Allah, I have found one!"
he finally starts making dua...
he says: "O' Allah if you please show me a parking spot or some space, I promise to love your Rasul
and the AhlulBayt "Right then, the car right in-front of him pulls out of a parking-bay, leaving an empty space...
He says: "Nevermind Allah, I have found one!"
sayed khamini(ha) would up the the the friday prayers evening by saying, "next friday I am going to preach on the subject of liars. And in this connection,
as a preparation for my discourse, I would like you all to read quran 115:1-45."
On the following friday, sayed khamini(ha) rose to begin, and said,
"Now, then, all of you who have done as I requested and read Quran 115:1-45, please raise your hands."
Nearly every hand in the mosque went up. Then the sayed said, "You are the people I want to talk to. There is no quran 115:1-45."
as a preparation for my discourse, I would like you all to read quran 115:1-45."
On the following friday, sayed khamini(ha) rose to begin, and said,
"Now, then, all of you who have done as I requested and read Quran 115:1-45, please raise your hands."
Nearly every hand in the mosque went up. Then the sayed said, "You are the people I want to talk to. There is no quran 115:1-45."
A Shia and a Sunni die and go to hell. While in hell, they are both allowed 1 phone call to someone to help them get out. Naturally, the Sunni calls Abu Bakr and the Shia calls Imam Ali . After their calls are over, they get their bill. The Shia notices his bill is wayyy more than the Sunnis, so he asks why this is so. He is told, "You're call was long-distance, the Sunnis was local!!" 
. After their calls are over, they get their bill. The Shia notices his bill is wayyy more than the Sunnis, so he asks why this is so. He is told, "You're call was long-distance, the Sunnis was local!!" --
Abbas
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